Ah well, this year’s Easter holiday has been pretty boring and not as cheery as it could’ve been but I am pleased with the progress that I have made with myself.   I’ve managed to get out and about and I haven’t had a panic attack since the holidays started, in fact I haven’t had one since before Joe’s funeral which is even better. Joe’s funeral was a big stepping stone for me in more ways than one; I managed to sit in a crowded church for nearly 2 hours without having a panic attack and it was also a chance to finally say goodbye to Joe. Not only am I proud of my recent achievements, my mum is and so is one of my very good friends and they both tell me frequently. It’s nice to know I have the support from those that I love and care for very much, especially two people that truly understand what I have been and am currently still going through.I’ve managed to go out into town without having a panic attack this Easter too. I went to visit Joe at the cemetery on Friday (13^th) with my friends and we were out just about all day. It’s lovely up there, Joe’s grave is full of flowers from visitors and a few are still there from the funeral. People have also been leaving little things that mean something.   

   I brought with me a picture of Joe and myself which I laminated and attached to a ribbon which my mum tied around the tulips she picked from the garden for me to take up there. I decided to tie the ribbon around the wooden cross that is Joe’s grave marker for the moment. I intend to visit Joe regularly, it’s lovely to just sit on his bench and talk to him. I’m sure that when we were up there I could here Joe’s voice as if he were talking to someone in the background.   1 month since you left us sweetie and I still miss you so much! xXx

On Saturday, there was a Sikh procession down my road which myself, mum and our neighbours watched and then in the afternoon I hung out with my neighbour and guess what… I didn’t have a panic attack! It may not seem like anything to get excited about or be proud of but it’s a big deal for me to be able to the “normal” things in life that I used to be able to do before my problems began almost a year ago now. Well that’s my exciting life updated for you, I’m sure you enjoyed reading it immensely lmao!  Bye for now! x